Simon Blake

Every year, normally in between Christmas and New Year I settle in to reflect on the year and think about what I am grateful for. It used to be a back of the notepad list and then over the last few years I have blogged about it. This year I don't think that period is going to be a time for quiet reflection.  2020 has been a bit of a beast of a year for so many reasons, and the impact of this year will be felt in so many ways for years to come globally, domestically, in cities, communities and families.  That said if we apply the principle that each day may not be good, but there are good things in every day to the year there is lots I am grateful for.   So here is my top ten; 1. My gorgeous Mum and Dad:  After Mum's diagnosis with late stage cancer in August, I have had the privilege of living with them both as we walk together writing Mum's final chapter. It hasn't always been easy emotionally or practically, but every single day they amaze and delight me. I am...

Very soon after I found out Mum was dying a colleague and friend wrote me a letter about their own experience of a parent dying and what they had learned from their experience. I was grateful when I got that letter through the post. So much wisdom. And I read it often. When children are born we know what to do. When people die we know we have to register the death and have a funeral. As a society we know a bit about grief and bereavement even though we can get much better at talking about it and supporting people through it.  We talk less about the process of dying. There is still, it seems, a worry that if we talk about what is happening we make it happen, which is poppycock of course. If we talk about death and dying we pass on the knowledge, we learn from the person dying and we can gain great comfort which will help us through the grieving process.  I have learned that having conversations about dying do not necessarily get easier, but the more we do it the easier it becom...

In the summer of 2019 Julie and I went for supper on the South Bank (remember those lovely times we could be together!). Julie's brother Roy had died a few months earlier. That night talked hard about our experiences of our brothers dying.  A month or so later I was on holiday at a health retreat. It was a place I have been to several times, and had been there shortly after my brother Andrew had died on what would have been his 46th birthday. Consequently Andrew is always on mind whenever we go back there. At MHFA England we were working with an innovation consultant Alex Pellew, and his book  The Idea in You was a holiday read (I recommend it) .  The overwhelming message I took from the book 'if you have an idea and you feel it, go for it and don't delay'. As I read the The Idea in You  I knew I wanted to use my experience of my brother dying to help others. I had felt very alone when Andrew had died and in my usual way I had tried to find things to read and wa...